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My pussy has nothing to do with your masculinity

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“It’s Just Not About Physical Sex, the Genital to Genital Fucking.”

AU-screening-essay-photo

From our screening at American University on September 24:

“It’s about love. And if it’s not about love, it’s about genuine passion and it doesn’t even have to be sexual passion. I mean it’s just not about physical sex, the genital to genital fucking. No, get to know me. Likely if I’m with you and I haven’t willfully left yet then I want to know you and I want you to get to know me. That way maybe we could form the relationship where we both feel completely comfortable with what we’re doing, and we could take it somewhere awesome from there. Because even if it’s just sex it’s not really just physical sex because we have this awesome, comfortable, honest connection. It could be genuine fun. I think we should try it.” – Sara Kokkelenberg

And here’s our Flickr set with all our photos from American. (See yours? Leave a comment on Flickr, and we’ll post it to the blog here.)

Date Rape, Axe, and Being Loud (Again) on Trains

I turned the Xacti on to read this bit from an anonymous sex column in American University’s paper, The Eagle, that we came across on the way down to our screening there later that night. Also: Amanda Hess’s reaction in the Washington CityPaper’s blog The Sexist. And what happens when you talk about sex real loud on the Amtrak.

On the Way to American University

Nancy and I had three hours on the train today with nothing to do but read blogs and point cameras at each other. (We’re dorks. I know.) Here’s what she said about our first college screening of the Fall, tonight at American University.

When Lines Get Smeared

What’s the “smeary line”? Writing on the situation at Hofstra this week — where a female student accused five men of raping her on campus, and then recanted within three days of bringing the charges — Emily Bazelon offers this as a way to make sense of things, maybe?

Some feminist voices began to admit that, yes, the hookup culture and dating in general had blurred into a charcoal smear their own line between consenting and being sexually assaulted.

Feminists may be working out their own rape doctrines, but these are still likely to be useless for police and prosecutors. Nonconsensual sex between two people who know each other, whatever you call it, is a terribly awkward fit for our adversarial criminal justice system.

This is an incredibly painful and tough case, especially as it fits into a long and drawn-out fight within feminism around how we address rape in the context of casual dating and hooking up. But the line around consent, I don’t think that’s all that smeary — it’s the way we talk about consent that’s almost always messy.