Comments on: Do Booty Calls Have an Expiration Date?

By: where is your line? » Blog Archive » Truly Free Film

where is your line? » Blog Archive » Truly Free Film — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 15:40:56 +0000

[...] about to get all film geek here, but lately (especially after certain drunken 2am round tables with students), I can’t shake the feeling that a feature film is growing out of conversations [...]

By: where is your line? » Blog Archive » We forgot to talk about pleasure

where is your line? » Blog Archive » We forgot to talk about pleasure — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 16:00:58 +0000

[...] a follow up workshop from last week’s screening at the New School. Students watched THE LINE and had a week to process, and bring back some writing. This class was the first to tangle with and challenge using [...]

By: bolod

bolod — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 00:24:09 +0000

Aye, LC, we actually had separate categories for ‘friends with benefits’, friends, and booty calls. We implied that if sexual and romantic nature is implied, it can never be purely friendly and exists on an entirely different plane than a coldfuck, a relationship or what you have with your homeboy/girl. We were all about creating boxes and boundaries for each of these oh-so-complex relationships so as to minimize hurt, confusion and blurred communication that often exists on the dating/fucking/crushing plane but its probably imperative to state that all of these (defined, or not) still exist on a continuum and there is always room for one defined relationship to progress into another category altogether.

By: Nancy

Nancy — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 16:56:08 +0000

Such is the nature of late night conversations that feed on each other!

By: LC

LC — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 15:56:38 +0000

I have to disagree about the Friends with Benefits issue. They can be your friends, and you can enjoy sex with them. I certainly agree that over time that is likely to evolve, and you should be aware of that, but I think it’s a case-by-case basis how bad an idea it is.

Pretending it in no way changes the relationship is silly, of course.

In a way, your tweet post is super-frustrating because I want to hear what the conversations WERE for every one of those subjects.

By: Nancy

Nancy — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 21:01:36 +0000

We missed you last night. It seems like booty call can turn into feelings after about 3 months, so if you’re trying to “keep it casual” you best get out sooner than later. We also discussed “friends with benefits”, and some we all sort of agree to that fucking your friends is a bad idea. They are your friends. If you want sex, get sex. If you actually like your friend, in “that way”, then admit it! Everyone at the table seemed pretty comfortable owning their vulnerability, but this was a pretty special group.
Ooh – the victim/labeling issue so complicated. Its no longer frustrating personally for me as a survivor to hear people tell me my rape wasn’t really rape (Whoopi Goldberg style), but it is really frustrating from a political perspective. Better to get motivated instead.

By: Carmen

Carmen — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 20:21:12 +0000

As the internet intern, I was devastated to be missing this! I watched the tweetstorm all night.

I think what’s interesting is what defines a booty call. Is it mutual? Can it be? If you’re calling, but I’m down, does that mean I’m getting pleasure at the expense of my respect?

Also, the “victim isn’t labeling it” thing has been one of the main problems with feminism since the beginning. How can you convince women to fight for rights when they don’t really care that they don’t have them, and they don’t feel quite as fucked over as you do?

(I almost went to the New School. Turns out, I picked ‘em well.)